my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Randomize
