I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
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