Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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