a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Randomize
