gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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