ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
