Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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