In the future we'll all be gay
It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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