I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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