HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
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