Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize