U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Randomize
