hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
