So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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