everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
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