naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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