I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Randomize
