Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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