dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
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