He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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