She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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