her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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