Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
