We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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