are you still at the devil's house?
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
