handjob tips. give me some.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
