think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
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