plz talk dirty to me
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
I need to calm my uterus...
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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