If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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