Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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