Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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