On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
