he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
