That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
