I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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