He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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