Already got asked if we're dating
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
