So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
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