i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
