don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize