Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I'm passing your future prison.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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