Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize