Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Randomize
