my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
