Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I enjoy the company of your penis
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize