well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
