Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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