and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize