I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Terrible idea I love it
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
