She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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