Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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